A Few Shots from Christmas

Checking out what Santa brought....

Trying out her new trike....

Her favorite new toy, The Animal Train....

With niece Sophia at our family celebration the day after Christmas....

She looks awfully good for someone with little sleep, no?  Wish I could say the same for Mom (notice she didn't make the blog).

Christmas Eve Magic

We went to the 5:00 church service yesterday.  Sarah looked so pretty in her dress and tights, and the new coat she got for Christmas.  Since we don't leave the house much, I'm used to seeing her in jeans or sweats.  She cleans up nicely, as they say.

The service was mostly a reenactment of "A Christmas Carol," and it certainly didn't hold Sarah's attention.  She was an angel for the ghost of Christmas Past, an itch for the ghost of Christmas Present, and in the narthex with me for the ghost of Christmas Future.  She and I shared a nice moment during the singing of Silent Night, though.  I was moved to tears as I held her in the glow of our small candle.

Since we would be home well past our usual dinner time, we decided to start a tradition of picking up Chinese food on the way.  A new restaurant just opened in the town next to ours, and I've been excited to take her there to see people from her homeland.  I was even hopeful they might take an interest in her and we could establish a relationship that would benefit her. 

So, despite the rain and extra time it took, we all went in to pick up the food.  We had no sooner stepped in the door than a Chinese woman waiting to order spotted us and headed our way.  She asked if Sarah was adopted.  I said, "Yes, from Jiangxi Province."  She introduced herself and asked if we were aware of the Chinese organization in La Cro**e.  She is the treasurer, and they're planning a Chinese New Year celebration in February.  She went on to tell me about the Chinese classes she teaches on Saturdays and to give me her contact information. 

Jackpot!  I had heard of a group in La Cro**e years ago when we started the adoption process but had been unsuccessful in tracking them down again recently.  I'm so excited to have connected with someone who can help us teach Sarah about her heritage.  This will be important, since we don't live in the most racially diverse area.  I left stunned that my little plan had worked so well.

The three of us had a ball at dinner.  Sarah loved the lo mein and seemed downright joyful.  She was animated and funny and reveled in entertaining us.  I think she is very happy in our little family.  Of course, she was up way past her bedtime and awake and ready to start the day at 3:50 this morning.  I guess that's the price we pay for precious memories.  I just hope my sleep-deprived brain can retain them....

Baking Christmas Cookies

We made sugar cookies yesterday.  I wish I had a shot of the expression on Sarah's face when she tasted the first one -- pure pleasure!

Three Days and a Wake-up...

to Sarah's first Christmas!  Of course, I'm more excited than she is this year.  So far, the most anticipation she's experienced is opening the doors on the chocolate advent calendar that my mom gave her.  She's definitely caught on to that.  We do it after lunch every day, and her face lights up when she sees the little picture inside and the chocolate waiting for her.  I'm afraid she'll actually be disappointed on Christmas Day when there are no more doors to open.

I've been busy making her stocking.  My mom made felt stockings for each one of her kids.  Mine has an angel on it, and I always thought it was so beautiful.  She still hangs it when I'm home for Christmas, and Santa always fills it to overflowing.  It's hard to believe it's survived 46 Christmases with little sign of wear and tear (except for a mysterious ink stain on the back).  I want to create a stocking for Sarah that she will always treasure.  I've been printing off templates from the Internet and carefully cutting and sewing.  I decided to put a Christmas tree on it.  It will be unadorned this year, except for the star, but I plan to add ornaments and garlands next year.  I don't want to rush the creative process.  :)

I'm really excited about our Christmas plans.  We'll go to church at 5:00 on Christmas Eve, then pick up Chinese food on the way home to enjoy by the tree.  Christmas Day will be quiet, with just the three of us at home, but we plan to cook a turkey anyway.  The next day, we'll have Don's kids -- Reid, Rachel, and Emily -- and Emily's husband Omar and daughter Sophia here.  It will be such fun to have everyone here...for the first time at Christmas (we usually celebrate at Don's parents' in the Twin Cities).  Unfortunately, there's a huge snowstorm headed our way, and travel could be bad from Wednesday to Sunday.  I sure hope it doesn't keep the kids away.  It's such a relief to not be traveling ourselves.
On Friday, we drove to Minneapolis for a follow-up visit at the International Adoption Clinic at the University of Minnesota.  Sarah is still in the 90th percentile for height, at almost 33".  She got rave reviews for her developmental progress since September, having mastered almost all of the tasks she couldn't do back then.  We also saw an attachment specialist who said she is doing wonderfully in that area.  In fact, the woman made a point of telling us it was time to institute more discipline and teach Sarah to be more independent.  She needs to learn to handle frustration.  She won't like that....

We spent much of the visit brainstorming with the doctors about how to help Sarah (and consequently ME)sleep.  We've developed a very enjoyable and quick bedtime routine, but she still wakes three or four times a night and is up for the day around 5:00 a.m.  I'm still sleeping in her room, and, after four months, I'm exhausted.

I wish I could say they had the magic answer, but basically they were only able to rule out a few things (gastric reflux, sleep apnea).  They think perhaps she needs more physical comfort while she sleeps, so they suggested we get her a weighted blanket and put rolled up blankets around the edges of her crib to make her sleeping space more cozy.  We're trying the rolled blankets tonight.  The weighted blankets are pricey (at least $70), so I plan to make one with rice.  I'm not overly optimistic any of this will make a difference, but anything is worth a try.

Time to sign off.  Don's offered to sleep with Sarah tonight so I can get some rest, so I'd better get to bed!  The odd thing is that I feel a little sad about not spending the night with her.  She's challenging, but I love her dearly.

First Snow

We had our first snowstorm last week -- a bonafide blizzard!  We got 13" at our house, which of course blew into big drifts.  It turned bitterly cold right after, so we didn't take Sarah out to play until yesterday.  We tested out her snowsuit and new sled (thanks, Jim and Linda!).  We believe this was her first experience with snow, since it doesn't snow much in Jiangxi Province.  She certainly took to it!

This morning, we put up our Christmas tree.  Sarah and Cadi seemed more interested in whether they could still get to their window to watch the world go by....

Goodbye to a Great Cat

We've lost our dear cat Reggie.  He was 15 and had steadily lost weight over the last year.  It could have been kidney disease or cancer.  It was obvious this past week that he was unhappy and uncomfortable.  He was having trouble walking, and, by Saturday, he'd stopped eating and just lay in the bathroom next to the heating vent, seeking warmth. 

So, Monday afternoon, I took the dreaded trip to the vet, and he died peacefully in my arms.  Yesterday, we buried him in the bed I knitted for him, among the shrubs at the corner of the riding ring, where he won't ever be disturbed.  Today, there's a thick blanket of snow over his grave.

Reggie was a big cat, with a personality to match.  Don called him a miniature puma.  He was all love; I've never seen a more affectionate cat.  He slept beside me every night, often under the covers, with my arms around him.  He would gaze into my eyes and stroke my face with his paw.  It was eerie how human he seemed sometimes.  I think in a previous life he was a very good man who, as a reward, was reincarnated as a cat.

Originally from Colorado, he lived with me in Maine before settling with us in Wisconsin.  For years, he was the one I came home to.  He was what made it home.  He grew to love Don, but he made it clear that he expected to have me to himself once the lights went out.  He would wait for our final cuddle before sleep, then I'd roll over, and he'd snuggle into my arms for the night.

Reggie welcomed two little sisters into the family...first dignified Luna, who died unexpectedly three years ago, and later rambuctious Sophie.  There wasn't a mean bone in his body, and, although he outweighed them almost 2:1, he always let them win wrestling matches.  He never could accept Cadi the Labrador, no matter how many times she tried to make friends.

Reg's final months were not how I'd envisioned.  I'd always planned to give him the best care possible and dote on him as the end came near.  Since Sarah came home, however, I've been preoccupied with her wellbeing and, frankly, somewhat overwhelmed by daily life.  I've slept on a twin bed in her room, with the door closed.  He had a tendency to yowl, and I lived in fear of his waking Sarah.  I even chased him down the hall a few times when he was being loud outside her door during naptime.

He didn't get to sleep with me for the last four months, and Don just didn't cut it.  His health declined precipitously after Sarah arrived, and I don't think it was a coincidence.  I think he felt pushed aside and neglected.  We visited the vet a few times, but it always took me longer than normal to get around to taking him.  He wasn't my priority anymore, and that made us both sad.

I'm not saying he died of a broken heart, but given his sensitive nature, I'm sure the new family situation affected his outlook on life.  He was as stressed as I was.  He lost his best friend and wasn't getting the nurturing he needed and deserved.

Reggie meant the world to me.  His health and happiness were my top priority for 15 years.  I'm afraid that changed in the 16th.  When I look back on our life together, I give him an A+ as a pet.  I hope he'd give me at least a B as an owner.  I loved him more than I've loved any other animal, and most people.  I hope he knew it.

A Little Christmas Spirit

We're gradually getting ready for Christmas around here.  Don put up the outside lights last weekend, and we turned them on a few nights ago.  I've put out a few of the indoor decorations, including the wooden nativity set I bought years ago.  Turns out it's a great one for little girls learning the Christmas story....

Last night, our neighborhood had its annual Christmas progressive dinner.  Since we're nowhere near ready to leave Sarah with a sitter, we took her along for the appetizer portion.  She was nervous at first, but she warmed up to everyone pretty quickly and was crawling around and cruising the furniture in no time.  She was a hit, of course.  Here's a shot of her before we headed out....

Today, we drove to the local tree farm to cut our Christmas tree.  We were quite the sight in our old Ford F250 pickup, with Sarah and Cadi the Lab in the back seat.  We took along Sarah's Burley stroller for the trek through the trees.  She seemed unimpressed by the outing; I'm sure she'll be more interested when we put the tree up this week.

Tomorrow, we make the drive to the county seat to "re-adopt" Sarah.  She, of course, is officially our daughter already, but this will allow us to get a Wisconsin birth certificate in addition to her Chinese one.  That should make things simpler down the road for her.  It will also be nice to have documentation from our own government.  Since we received her Social Security number a few weeks ago, this should be the last administrative detail in this interminable endeavor.  Hallelujah!

Re-entry

We're back from Massachusetts, and I think we're all recovering pretty well.  It was wonderful to see my family, most for Sarah's first time.  It was just exhausting for all of us.

Sarah did a lot better during the the visit than I'd expected.  In fact, she seems to be having a harder time readjusting to being at home than she had getting used to Grammy's.  I wonder if it's some sort of PTSD (not that I'm calling the trip traumatic). 

She seemed comfortable sleeping in the Pack n Play in my old bedroom with me and slept well at bedtime and naptime at first.  She had a progressively harder time, though, and was racking up a deficit, so I'm glad we didn't stay longer.

On Tuesday, we had lunch with my Uncle Bill and his partner Jane.  Sarah was a charmer as always.  She had her first drink of water from a straw, which she mastered quickly.  Unfortunately, she then pulled the straw from the plastic cover and proceeded to groom herself with the water that dribbled out.  I'm not kidding.  She would get water on her hands then run them through her hair and down her face.  It was like an Herbal Essences commercial...not exactly table-appropriate behavior.  She also had her first taste of lobster, from my yummy lobster roll.  She found it to her liking.

Sarah's cousins, Forrest, Sam, and Kelley, had a half-day of school on Wednesday, so we visited that afternoon.  She was a little overhelmed by all of the attention and activity but held up pretty well through guitar and saxophone solos and being deluged with hand-me-down toys.  She was one hungry, tired girl by dinnertime, though.

We were at Grammy's for Thanksgiving Day, and the meal was amazing, as always, with my mom's farm-raised turkey and homemade pies.  After dinner, Sarah started climbing the two stairs between the dining room and kitchen and quickly got into her "zone."  Up, down, up, down, over and over.  Her cousins got in on the action, and she kept everyone entertained for a good half-hour.

Sarah made Grammy's day by letting her hold her for a few seconds on Tuesday, the first person other than Don and me to hold her since we came home from China.  On Thursday, she let Grammy hold her for a few minutes, which really put a smile on Grammy's face.

Our trip home Friday was fairly uneventful.  We had a long layover in Minneapolis and just happened to choose gates with flights to Tokyo and Beijing to relax and let Sarah do some crawling on the carpet.  She loved seeing all of the Asian faces and even got to say "hello" to a little boy about her age.

As I mentioned earlier, Sarah seems to be having a rough time re-entering our quiet life on the farm.  On Friday and Saturday, she was whiny and clingy and just plain unhappy.  She seems to have returned to her contented self today, though.  Sleep-wise, she's been an angel.  The last two nights, she's pointed to her crib, then laid there quietly while going to sleep -- no jabbering, rolling, or sitting up -- and been out in less than 10 minutes.  She's been restless during the night but hasn't cried much.  She's been up at 5:20 both mornings, uncanny since that's the time she was waking before our trip.  She has a strong biological clock, that girl.

We're Off!

We fly back to Massachusetts tomorrow.  I've been packing, and I'm exhausted. I used to get stressed out about packing for myself.  Now, I also have a toddler to pack for.  There's the panda bear, the favorite burp cloth, the special quilt, the sound machine, the lullaby CD, the right books...all of which can't actually be put in a suitcase until tomorrow, since they're needed tonight.  You should see my checklist.

I've been telling Sarah that we're going in an airplane to visit Grammy, and I think she gets it.  She points to Mom's photo on the fridge and smiles.  I've been trying to prepare her for meeting her uncles and cousins, too, but I think that will still be a bit overwhelming.  Then again, she loves people, so I'm sure she'll just roll with it.

The sleeping is going okay. We had some really good nights last week, then a couple of bad. Thursday night, she got up in the middle of the night and screamed when I put her back in the crib. I decided to try leaving the room, since I've sensed that I just antagonize her by being there and ignoring her. She screamed for 55 minutes. I went back in at intervals, the way "they" say to, but she just got progressively angrier until she wore herself out and went to sleep.  She showed no signs of trauma in the morning, but I'm not happy that I did it.  I really don't know what the right thing to do is, but that doesn't feel right.  I'm still determined to get her to sleep without crying.

To make matters worse, we took her to an opthalmologist on Friday (per the International Adoption Clinic's recommendation). We had no idea how invasive it would be. They put drops in her eyes, which made her scream, then came back ten minutes later (after she had recovered) and put more in. The nurse then told me she'd need another round of drops, since her eyes are so dark. She also said they would strap her to a "papoose board" to hold her down to see into her eyes.

At that point, Don and I decided to just leave and cut our losses. We told the doctor, and he said, "We won't do more drops, and I'll just see what I can see with her in your lap." He did, and he saw enough to say there aren't any tumors or anything, but that's about it. I feel awful that we put her through that. It seems unnecessary.  I can't help but think that doctors sometimes do procedures, or recommend them, just because they're available, not because they're needed.  No other kids get their eyes checked at 16 months....

As if that weren't enough, she got her seasonal flu booster and her first H1N1 shot, also.  It was one hellacious day for Sarah Grace.  I can't believe she has to get an H1N1 booster in a month.  Will the torture never end?

In cheerier news, Sarah seems to be learning new skills every day.  She has finally mastered stacking the wooden rings on the spindle, and she's starting to figure out puzzles, which is exciting.  What I find most impressive, though, is that she's learned matching.  She has a wooden Noah's Ark set.  She'll pick up an animal, and I'll tell her the name, then I'll say, "Where's the other one?"  She scans the pile, and picks the right one every time!  That reminds me, I need to go get the monkey out of the pile.  Its mate is missing, and she goes crazy looking for it.

She now crawls like the wind and pulls herself up on everything, including the dog.  Thankfully, Cadi is very patient.  She loves to stand at our big picture window and look for the donkeys and watch cars going by.  She can stand on her own for maybe five seconds and cruises the furniture with ease.  We have a stained glass rooster hanging in an east-facing window in the living room, and she looks for it every morning as the sun comes up, then does her "cock-a-doodle-do" rendition.

There's so much to be grateful for this Thanksgiving.  We are blessed.

Dreaming of Sleep

I can sum up our last week or so by stating what we haven't been doing, which is sleep.  It's old news now, but Sarah continues her struggles with slumber.  On Monday, after a night of no less than nine wakings, I called the International Adoption Clinic for advice.  The nurse told me that I had gone beyond the call of duty by sleeping in Sarah's room for this long and that it was time to teach her to put herself to sleep (and back to sleep) by Ferberizing and return to my own bed. 

If you're unfamiliar with Richard Ferber's method, it's basically letting the child "cry it out."  You leave her in her room to go to sleep and check back in five minutes to let her know you're still around.  Then you leave for 10 minutes, then 15 (or maybe 20, I forget).  I've been opposed to this practice from the beginning, since, in my opinion, it goes against the basic premise of helping an adopted child feel safe and cared for and, well, it just seems unnecessarily cruel.  When our pediatrician told us to do it a couple of weeks ago, I listened politely, thinking, "This woman doesn't know anything about adopted kids." 

When the nurse at the Adoption Clinic, who had consulted with the director of the clinic, told me to do it, however, I thought it might be worth a try.  Chronic fatigue and the hope that Sarah might not even cry when I left pushed me over the edge.  So, Monday night, when she reached for her crib after her bottle, I put her in, kissed her goodnight, and left, clutching the baby monitor. 

At first, she just seemed confused and called out for me a few times.  Then she whimpered and started to cry.  She cried rather half-heartedly for a few minutes then stopped and seemed to be talking to herself.  This is when I made my Big Mistake. 

When five minutes had passed and she wasn't crying, I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to go in or not (remember, I was running on very little sleep).  So, I went in.  She was sitting in her crib, not looking traumatized at all.  I told her I loved her and was right outside and left again. 

This time, she started screaming right away, in anger.  She cried for a few minutes then stopped and began babbling.  Not having learned my lesson, I went in at the 10-minute mark.  When I left, she began to wail, and it wasn't in anger.  She quickly became hysterical.  I knew what I was supposed to do now -- I was supposed to let her cry, to the point of making herself sick, if necessary, to teach her to soothe herself to sleep (as contradictory as that may sound).  I went in.  I just couldn't do that to her.  When I reached the crib, she lunged for me.  I picked her up and comforted her, to no avail.  I finally sat on my bed, and she dove for the quilt and passed out.

The next day, I talked with an attachment therapist and told her that three medical professionals had told me to Ferberize my daughter and I didn't agree with them.  But she did.  She said it was for Sarah's own good, and the sooner the better because it will just get harder.  Hmmm....  I told her that I had screwed up by going in when Sarah was content and that I was worried I'd blown the chance to have her learn with minimal trauma.  She said, "Nonsense, that's the beauty of parenting, you always get another chance to get it right."  I'm not sure I  believe that, but it's a nice thought.

I usually have faith in experts.  I guess it's my scientific background.  But I also believe in following my heart, and that usually wins out.  Experience has shown that my heart can't always be trusted, but I still can't help listening to it, and it's becoming more reliable with age.  Besides, I'm the expert on Sarah Grace Hultman.  :)

So, I've developed my own strategy.  I've decided to put her in her crib and teach her to go to sleep while I'm in the room reading (by flashlight) and sleep in her room until she can put herself back to sleep without crying or my picking her up. Once she can do those things, I'll try leaving her alone to go to sleep, and I'll go back to sleeping in my bed.  I hope that will soften the hard blow of reality for her.

Last night, she went to sleep in her crib in about 15 minutes, with little crying. She woke at 3:30 this morning and went back to sleep on her own in a few minutes, after I tucked her back in.  She slept until 6:00.  I think that's a big improvement.  I hope within a few nights she'll be pretty good at putting herself to sleep and maybe even sleep in a little longer.

We're definitely making progress on naps. I've learned that sleep is like money, the more you get, the more you get ("the rich get richer").  So, I've become obsessive about Sarah's naps.  This week, I've mastered listening for her to wake up and rushing in to rub her back and put her back to sleep (it's worked three times so far!).  Her naps have stretched from about 1 - 2 hours to 2 - 3 hours.  That should help her sleep better at night.

By the way, if you're looking for some interesting reading (perhaps when you can't sleep?), I recommend Sleepless in America, by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka.  It's full of useful information and suggestions for improving your kids' and your own sleep (but be prepared to pare back the extracurricular activities and TV time).

Amidst all my anguish over Sarah's sleep, I've been worrying about our Thanksgiving plans.  We've planned since the summer to drive back to Massachusetts to be with my family so that Sarah can meet her uncles and cousins and spend her first Thanksgiving where the holiday began (a little Yankee pride showing there).  On the way, we were going to spend a night with my dear friend Alison and her family. 

Months ago, I really thought Sarah would be ready for such a trip.  I've been having misgivings for the last couple of weeks, though.  Along with the sleep concerns, it became clear on Sunday that she would not endure a 20-hour car ride gracefully.  We drove to the Twin Cities to visit Don's family, a six-hour roundtrip.  She slept about 30 minutes.  For the last hour of the drive home, she cried and reached for me.  She'd reached her limit.

On Monday, I decided that the trip to Mass. was sheer lunacy.  Even if we all survived the drive, how would Sarah get any rest in unfamiliar surroundings.  My conversation with the nurse put the nail in the coffin.  She said the trip would probably set us back to Square 1 in the sleep department.  I don't remember what Square 1 was, but I don't want to go back there!

Fortunately, I must have gotten a little more sleep than usual Monday night, and yesterday I started brainstorming other options.  We've decided to fly back to Mass., which will cut the duration of the trip in half and drastically reduce the complexity. Fortunately, the trip to China gave us enough frequent flyer miles to get cheap tickets, even at this late date. 

I know the trip will probably still wreak havoc on Sarah's sleep routine, but I'm prepared to work on it for a week or two after we return before I can implement the "sleeping on her own" plan.  I think it will be worth it for Sarah to be surrounded by family on her first Thanksgiving.  Some things are more important than sleep.

Now, your reward for slogging through all of that (or did you just scroll down until you saw photos????)....

Then and Now

Sarah came to us three months ago today.  What a transformative three months it's been (for all of us).  Is this the same child?

In China on Day 3:

At home last week:

The same child, no doubt, but so much happier and relaxed.  I love you, Sarah!

A Prized Promotion

This was supposed to be the customary "could she be any cuter?" First Halloween post, but I'm feeling moved to make it more.  I'm on the verge of tears...joyful tears...and I have to share.  Maybe it was the three-shot turtle mocha I got at Caribou Coffee on the way home from church, but I don't think so.  I am just genuinely and completely happy.  I don't recall feeling this way...ever.

Of course, since marrying Don, I have been happier than I thought possible, but now it's reached a new level.  Caring for someone who cannot care for herself and seeing the happiness and contentment she feels is overwhelming.  It chokes me up.

In the last week, Sarah seems to have promoted me from favorite nanny to Mommy.  There is more tenderness and trust in her actions.  When I pick her up, she wraps her arms and legs around me and pats me on the back enthusiastically.  When I rock her to sleep, she buries her head in my chest and melts into me.  Upon waking in the wee hours last night, she calmly rolled over and went back to sleep after I reassured her from my bed beside her crib.  It was magical.

I get great joy from watching her play in her room.  Every so often, she'll head down the hall and disappear into the space Don and I created just for her.  She starts the lullabies on her boom box, pulls out some books, plays with her shoes, and hugs one of her panda bears.  She seems utterly sanguine and secure.  It makes my heart swell.

In church this morning, between crumpling the bulletin and playing with the hand sanitizer, she lifted her little face for a kiss, and then for another.  It doesn't get much better.

When I told Don how happy I feel, he said, "Patience pays off."  But those of you who knew me B.D. know I was anything but patient.  I was often downhearted and even depressed.  The last four years of waiting for Sarah were sheer torture, and I sometimes lost hope.  But I persevered, and I am so thankful I did.  I had no idea the rewards would be so rich.

So now, after all that sentimentality, here is a photo of Sarah from last night.  It was a low-key evening, as usual, with only three Trick-or-Treaters at our door.  After dinner, I put Sarah's ladybug costume on her (a transformation she found confusing, I'm sure), loaded her into the Burley stroller, and headed for our two backdoor neighbors' houses.  She was quiet and stonefaced most of the time, but they got a treat.  Marie gave her a box of mini Teddy Grahams, which I've decided is the perfect First Halloween handout.  We came home, ate a few bears before bed, and called it a night.

Post-nap Photo Shoot

I tried to take a photo of Sarah hugging her panda bear right after she woke from her nap a bit ago.  My camera is so slow, that I kept missing the shot.  The sequence I got is pretty fun, though.  In the second one, she's giving her "surprised" look that she learned in her Baby Faces book.

Down with Doctors

Sarah had her 15-month Well-Child visit today.  Well, this child is still not keen on medical personnel.  Maybe every baby screams the way she does and I'm just overly sensitive to it because she's my daughter, but it breaks my heart. 

I decided we could go along with the protocol this time and get her undressed for her measurements.  That threw her into a panic, and she lunged for Daddy to save her.  The nurse managed to get some readings despite her protests.  She's up to 24 lbs., 4 oz. (71st percentile); 32" long (85th); and 46.5 cm head circumference (68th).  She's a big, healthy girl.

Once we were in the examining room and she had calmed down, she sat on my lap for the exam.  The instant the stethoscope touched her chest, she erupted again.  This didn't bode well for the vaccinations that were coming up. 

Being the cagey mom, I got Dad to hold her for the shots so I could be the rescuer.  The poor little thing endured two in each thigh and two more in her arm.  She got high grades from the nurse for her strength -- she's a sturdy farm girl.

On the way home, she sat in stunned silence, clutching a Fig Newton but refusing to eat it.  To make things worse, she started to doze about five minutes from the house, and I started hassling her to keep her awake (falling asleep in the car seat has doomed many naps).  She's now snoozing peacefully, dreaming of a land without doctors, no doubt. 

Thanks, Mom and Heather!

My mom and sister left on Wednesday, and we're back to our nuclear threesome.  We all enjoyed their visit.  Sarah really warmed up to Grammy by the last couple of days and let Grammy hold her hands while she stood.  I think she might have let Grammy hold her, if we had allowed it.  We're being careful to follow the advice of the doctor at the International Adoption Clinic in Minneapolis and not let anyone but Don and me hold her for four-six months to promote attachment.  I know it's hard on the grandmothers.  I'm considering compromising just a bit and letting Mom hold her when we visit at Thanksgiving, since it will have been almost four months. 

Sarah was a little tougher on Auntie Heather and made her keep her distance.  She was fascinated and entertained by Heather but wouldn't let her touch her.  She enjoyed Heather's renditions of goofy '40s tunes and Elvis classics when they were riding in the backseat together, but she was happier when I sat between them. 

Mom, Heather, and I ventured to Winona while Sarah napped on Tuesday.  Mom had lunch with an old friend, and Heather and I ate a block away.  It was fun to spend time alone with Heather, which rarely happens.  It was also wonderful to be able to talk with her "mother-to-mother" (finally!).  We agreed that we wouldn't want to be anything else and are fortunate to be home full-time with our kids.  We enjoy the challenges of keeping a home together and tending to the needs of little ones.  There's nothing more meaningful for us.

I know it was a big sacrifice for both of them to travel all the way to see us, and I'm grateful that they made the effort to meet Sarah.  I think it will make our visit to Massachusetts much easier for her now that she knows them.  Meeting her three crazy cousins and two uncles for the first time will be enough excitement, I think.  :)

Note:  For those wondering how I've found time to write three posts today, I'll explain.  The first, of course, was with Sarah asleep in the carrier.  The last two have been while Don has taken Sarah for a ride to try to cheer her up.  They've been scoping out waterfowl hunting spots, I think.  It's the first time I've been alone in the house since we got back from China, and it's been VERY quiet.  Fortunately, they just pulled into the garage.  :)

My Beautiful Daughter

A few weeks ago, our minister asked us to pose for a photo to be used on the cover of our church's stewardship brochure.  A church member who is a professional photographer took the shot of Don and me holding Sarah with the minister appearing to baptize her.  While we were there, I asked if he'd take a few shots of Sarah alone.  She was less than pleased with the whole situation, but he managed to get this adorable portrait.  Oh, and we're now "the faces" of our church.  Wouldn't Nana be proud?

Rainy Day, Inside and Out

It's a cold, rainy, fall day -- miserable outside and not  much sunnier inside.  Sarah is uncharacteristically crabby.  Although she's had a few good nights of sleeping, last night was bumpy again.  She couldn't seem to get comfortable and ended up crying uncontrollably around midnight. 

This morning, she was whiny and wanted to be held.  So, I strapped on the Ergo carrier, put on Jack Johnson's CD of songs from the Curious George movie (which I LOVE -- thank you, Cindy!), and danced with her while feeding her Bunny Grahams.  She lasted about 15 minutes then fell asleep before she could deliver the next bunny to her mouth.  She's now snoozing away on my chest.  It's enough to break your heart.  :)  It reminds me of our time in China.

I'm feeling blessed to be able to adjust my day to accommodate Sarah's needs.  What a gift to just stop what I was doing and tend to her.  I find comforting her immensely soothing.  I wouldn't want to be doing anything else.

A Visit from Grammy and Auntie Heather

My mom and sister arrived from Massachusetts on Friday for a five-day visit.  Sarah has been enjoying her new audience and regaling them with her antics.  She's happy to entertain them as long as Don or I is close by but doesn't want to be left alone with them or have them touch her...a good sign in terms of attachment.  Although we felt she was attaching well to us, it's good to have this confirmation, since we haven't had many people around to see what her response would be.

Yesterday, we set out to find pumpkins for the yard (since our efforts at growing our own this year produced about five, all of which quickly rotted).  We visited a pick-your-own operation, and Sarah thoroughly enjoyed sharing the wheel barrow with our pickings.  As you can see, she's taken fashion cues from both Dad and Mom, opting for a hooded sweatshirt and LLBean field coat....

This morning, she enjoyed seeing photos of her cousins on Auntie Heather's camera....

She put on quite a show rolling around in the papasan chair before dinner this evening.  I'm hoping she wore herself out and will sleep soundly (in contrast to last night, when she was awake six times).  She almost slept through the night the night before Mom and Heather arrived.  I'm afraid all the excitement has derailed her once again.  Oh, well, at least we know a restful night is within the realm of possibilities.  Maybe once they've left, she'll be able to slay her sleep demons.