A Prized Promotion

This was supposed to be the customary "could she be any cuter?" First Halloween post, but I'm feeling moved to make it more.  I'm on the verge of tears...joyful tears...and I have to share.  Maybe it was the three-shot turtle mocha I got at Caribou Coffee on the way home from church, but I don't think so.  I am just genuinely and completely happy.  I don't recall feeling this way...ever.

Of course, since marrying Don, I have been happier than I thought possible, but now it's reached a new level.  Caring for someone who cannot care for herself and seeing the happiness and contentment she feels is overwhelming.  It chokes me up.

In the last week, Sarah seems to have promoted me from favorite nanny to Mommy.  There is more tenderness and trust in her actions.  When I pick her up, she wraps her arms and legs around me and pats me on the back enthusiastically.  When I rock her to sleep, she buries her head in my chest and melts into me.  Upon waking in the wee hours last night, she calmly rolled over and went back to sleep after I reassured her from my bed beside her crib.  It was magical.

I get great joy from watching her play in her room.  Every so often, she'll head down the hall and disappear into the space Don and I created just for her.  She starts the lullabies on her boom box, pulls out some books, plays with her shoes, and hugs one of her panda bears.  She seems utterly sanguine and secure.  It makes my heart swell.

In church this morning, between crumpling the bulletin and playing with the hand sanitizer, she lifted her little face for a kiss, and then for another.  It doesn't get much better.

When I told Don how happy I feel, he said, "Patience pays off."  But those of you who knew me B.D. know I was anything but patient.  I was often downhearted and even depressed.  The last four years of waiting for Sarah were sheer torture, and I sometimes lost hope.  But I persevered, and I am so thankful I did.  I had no idea the rewards would be so rich.

So now, after all that sentimentality, here is a photo of Sarah from last night.  It was a low-key evening, as usual, with only three Trick-or-Treaters at our door.  After dinner, I put Sarah's ladybug costume on her (a transformation she found confusing, I'm sure), loaded her into the Burley stroller, and headed for our two backdoor neighbors' houses.  She was quiet and stonefaced most of the time, but they got a treat.  Marie gave her a box of mini Teddy Grahams, which I've decided is the perfect First Halloween handout.  We came home, ate a few bears before bed, and called it a night.